In 2011, I took a similar picture on this porch with my husband. We were celebrating our first Thanksgiving in our new house. It was almost a dream come true. It was almost what I had always pictured. I thought the goal in life was to be happily married, have good jobs, and buy a nice house. The only thing missing from this picture were the kids we never had. However, beyond the image, what was hidden inside was real life. A real struggle and spiritual battle that had existed almost since the beginning. And, why wouldn’t it. The enemy comes to steal, kill, and destroy. Marriage is his #1 target.
So today, Thanksgiving 2016, I take a picture that isn’t…. what I pictured. What sits behind me is an empty home with various types of memories and a dying dream. It appears that the enemy is winning and tearing apart what should never be torn apart and Biblically never will. However, beyond this image, what is hidden inside is real faith. Faith that I couldn’t have dreamed of having without this trial. Mainly, because the forgiveness that is now in my heart is authentic. Mainly, because more than ever have I grasped the importance of being a praying wife and cherish my remaining days as my husband’s wife to do just that. Mainly, because the story of the Prodigal Son that I hated so dearly in the Bible (since I’ve always empathized with the older brother), has now become my favorite because I now have the heart of the father.
This is not what I pictured my future would be, but I also would have never pictured this new level of conviction I have moving forward to stand for God’s truth and truly believe He can conquer all. This isn’t what I had pictured, but I know this picture rests in God’s hands.
To God Be the Glory
Ezekiel 11:19 NIV
I will give them an undivided heart and put a new spirit in them; I will remove from them their heart of stone an give them a heart of flesh.